I’ve been sharing my room with my sister, since we have a full house at my parents at the moment, and last night we got to talking about life and how is it that it actually works, or so we speculated. You see my sister and I are very different, yet very similar in a sense deeper than the physical one, where it’s obvious we come from the same gene pool. We both seem to have an Achiles’ heel, something we struggle with and where we find our most challenging learning experiences, for her it’s her job/professional life and for me it’s men/romantic relationships. It’s interesting actually to look back and see how these particular buckets of our lives are the ones we work really hard at and within which things just don’t come easy for us.
I have this theory that our life has many buckets which need to be filled, for me these are: family/friends, romantic relationships, work/profession, spirituality, physical/health, emotional wellbeing and sexuality. Some of them overlap, and sometimes it is very difficult to do well in one bucket when doing bad in another, but I try, I try hard to balance them out. Inspite of all my trying, for someone unknown reason, my romantic relationships bucket seems to always be the one giving more to do. It’s like it has a hole, a crack, a leak somewhere very difficult to identify.
My sister has, for as a long as I can remember, been in disonance with her job, her boss, her coworkers, or just something or someone (it’s usually a person) related to her job. I on the other hand can’t seem to stop talking, not to mention thinking, about the man in my life and how to “fix” the current situation. It’s like we have this monotopic conversation which overloads us and the people around us. We sometimes just laugh at ourselves and continue, listening to each other or talking and explaining ourselves out load to see if any of it makes sense to us or to the other. We’ve sort of figure out some parallelisms we both can learn from, even if they are taking place in different buckets for each other.
So last night we were talking about her job and I asked her “I think we’re doing something wrong. It can’t be this hard, can it?” She said ”I think it is this hard. I mean, I don’t think I’m a particularly dumb person.” While I responded “Well, I don’t either, but I think we’re missing something, it has to be easier than this.” And as usual, we were left to ponder because the answers are never handed to us.
What do you think? Do you have all your buckets in order? Have you found it hard or easy? How do you think it works?