The love of your life

“As Alice took a shower, she realized it came down once again to one thing: What did she believe in? In other words, what kind of life did she want to live? Did she really think the love of her life was out there? Did she think is was wise to go back out into the wilds of being single just in the hopes of finding him? What was she holding out for? As she toweled herself off, she realized that she didn’t want to be the girl who refused to settle. She didn’t want to be the girl who believed that life is short and it’s better to be single and looking for “the love of your life” than to just give up and settle. She didn’t want to be that girl. She thought that girl was stupid. Naive. Alice liked being practical; she was a lawyer, so she preferred to be realistic. Waiting and searching for the love of your life was exhausting. It might even be delusional. Again, yes, she knew that some people win the lottery and get to fall in love with someone who is also mad about them, and their life together is harmonious and filled with love. But she didn’t want to be the girl who stubbornly held out for what might never come.

She sat back down on her bed, wrapped in a little towel, and she began to cry. She started sobbing; she hugged her legs and she put her head on her knees and rocked and wept.

She realized she was that girl.” (How to be single, Liz Tucillo, p. 331)

So have you found the love of your life?
Are you still looking/waiting for him?
Or have you decided to be practice/realistic and settled?
Which girl are you and how did you come to this realization?

7 responses to “The love of your life

  1. I’m not a girl, Jen!Hold on. Is this why Alice ran away to Wonderland? Suddenly it all makes sense.

  2. So, here’s the thing about why I disagree with the way that statement was written. There is an underlying assumption that a person is either “on the hunt” or “settling.” There are other options.For me, it was only when I stopped looking altogether that my fiance came into my life. He is my perfect match. He is my one. By no means am I settling. But, I didn’t hunt him down, either.

  3. I can’t settle, but then if I don’t make an effort to get out there, I’ll never meet anyone. So I envy the above statement. I don;t think I;ve ever met anyone by chance without making some sort of effort, without being at least a little on the look out. But I’m not unhappy that way either. I’d definitely rather be single than like other people live for years of their lives.And I hardly ever sit down and bawl about it 🙂

  4. Whoa. Deep questions today. I’m sorry, but I can’t answer those questions … now, if ever. Sometimes, I like to think that we get points for just getting through the day without pondering our long-term goals regarding men. Does that make sense? I vote yes. All other fans of short-term goals, meet me at the bar 🙂

  5. Love & Lust, Romance & Reality, Interesting & Compatible- will always be at odds… but blend together to create what we all hope to find..

  6. joe – you know what, suddenly it makes sense to me too! : )nilsa – I’m so glad you found your perfect match. Hearing that always makes me smile and helps me keep the hope alive. Now regarding this though, here’s a question for you, what were you thinking when you stopped looking all together?the sarjent – I think I agree. I need to feel somewhat proactive about it. molly – : ) I vote yes to that too, some days you just have to get through without thinking about anything beyond your next task.buffalodick – always so wise : )

  7. Aw I dunno! I meet plenty of great wonderful sweet men and sometimes we play house and are very happy. But I don’t believe in ‘the one’ and I’m never 100% sure whether he is the right person for me. I also don’t ever think I will be sure. Yet being afraid of making a mistake is not a good excuse for holding back from taking the leap.

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